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The drill sergeant making his morning announcements to a group of newcomers in a training camp, stated:
“Today, gentlemen, I have some good news and some bad news.
First, the good news Let. Asad will be setting the pace on our morning run.”
With this the platoon was overjoyed, as Let. Asad was overweight and terribly slow.
But then the drill sergeant finished his statement:
“Now for the bad news. Let. Adad will be driving a truck.”
During training exercises, the Lieutenant driving down a
muddy back road encountered another car stuck in the mud
with a red-faced colonel at the wheel.
“Your jeep stuck, sir?” asked the Lieutenant as he pulled
alongside.
“Nope,” replied the Colonel, coming over and handing him
the keys, “Yours is.”
During basic army training, a sergeant was telling his group how a submachine gun sprayed bullets.
He drew a circle on a blackboard and announced that it had 260 degree.
“But, sergeant, all circles have 360 degrees,” called out a conscript.
“Don’t be stupid,” the sergeant roared. “This is a small circle.”
Sergeant: Private, I think the enemy soldiers are hiding in the wood.
I want you to go in there and flush them out for us.
Private: Okay, sir, but if you see a bunch of guys running out the woods,
don’t shoot the one in front.
US Ship: – (at night) “Move out of my way”
Canadian: – “No. We cant”
US ship: – “Ours is an important big ship with attacking equipments”
Canadian: – “We are a light house on a small island. We cannot move”